Some people don’t even know they have ADHD until they’re adults. That’s one reason why they might get frustrated with you. Household chores can be a challenge when you have adult ADHD. Your family members may be doing more than their fair share of keeping the household running smoothly. ''You never do what you say you’re going to do.'' You meant it when you said you’d get to your son’s basketball game by p.m. But then you got distracted at work, and your cell phone rang, and then you realized you needed to pick up the dry cleaning.And if you have it, it could be causing relationship problems. While everyone is different, some common problems seem to affect the relationships of adults with ADHD. On the other hand, you might feel like they're nagging you. ''You never pull your weight around here.'' Mowing the lawn. If the people you live with tell you that you aren’t doing enough, take a step back and consider whether they’re right. And before you knew it, the game was over -- and you were in the dog house.We begin to learn more and more about the lifetime of disappointments and suffering which the other person has had to survive to get to this present relationship with us.We begin to return fears and accusations to their source in such past relationships.''People with ADHD very much intend to do something when they say it. '' Do you feel like you’re always getting blamed for forgetting things, when you know no one actually told you about them?It’s not like some problems where people lie or are deceitful,'' says Steven Safren, Ph D, director of behavioral medicine in the department of psychiatry at Massachusetts General Hospital. Consider this: The condition often causes people to forget things they’re told.
Unlike the shallow dating pool of high school, college is an ocean of options.
Attraction can get going rather quickly, often in the first contact, and often in a “split second.” Contact is made and then lost and then reestablished. Speech can reveal a great deal about a person’s background, cultural, educational, and family characteristics, which may fuel or upset the emerging connection.
Eyes meet briefly; smiles are exchanged, as are some anxious, non-verbal courting gestures. Humor, irony, optimism or pessimism, boasting, or dislike of self each suggests personality trends that will become important as this potential relationship evolves.
A critical transition occurs when the contact moves from visual appraisal and flirty gestures to “talking.” So much is revealed by the tone and conversational style of the other person.
The contact can be too stimulating and result in unappealing behaviors; the moments of being out-of-sync can be interpreted as “time to give up.” Also, the initial upsurge of sexual urges can be disconcerting.